When I grow up I would definitely get married (key phrase: when I grow up, because I am still growing). And in other to make things easy for my wife to be, I have come up with a couple of things about me that she would need to know. Single ladies please take note, it could be one of you or better put, e fit be you o!!!!!!!!!!!

Dear future wife,

  • Some say that the way to a man’s heart is through his stomach. Well, if you check very well, my name is not on that list. I mean, if you are a great cook, I’d consume your food with all joy, but it doesn’t guarantee getting to my heart at all.
  • The fact that you cannot get to my heart through my stomach doesn’t mean you shouldn’t know how to cook. I am an African, I love my food.
  • I know there will be a change in my body once we get married, but I beg you, I do not want a pot where my stomach is right now. A pot belly isn’t a sign of good living, is it?
  • Boy or girl, a child is a child. You do not need to put yourself under any unnecessary pressure.
  • My father had six children and I hope to surpass his achievements. Go figure *straight face*
  • Our children will learn how to play at least one musical instrument.
  • After we must have dated for some time, I then decide to pop the question; you now tell me you want to think about it. THINK ABOUT WHAT? YES, THINK ABOUT WHAT? (Just behave yourself in advance there).
  • I am discerner of human minds from their countenance. So if you are unhappy about something or need something from me, please tell me about it and speak “English”. Making faces will not help.
  • I know that mood swings is a part of make-up kits for women. It would be nice if you do not wear it all the time.
  • I just hope your father is not looking at you as a source of making MEGA bucks in terms of your dowry. I sincerely hope not.
  • My parents disciplined me well, my children will receive DOUBLE. *adjusts shirt collar*
  • *on my knees* I hope you do not nag. If you are the type that does, I will gladly leave the house for you and stay at the roof top. I will run away from you. 

I am very certain that I would not be able to state everything here. So you will learn more about me as time goes by. So with all these points of mine I have been able to convince and not confuse you that……..never mind.

Yours sincerely,

Tony pox.